Keep forgetting to forget about you
by Nefis
Summary: There's Jacob and then there's Edward. Who does she choose? Ah, but that is not the true question here. Who is more willing to give her everything, even the world, to make her happy? Who's the rose with no thorns? Will friendship defeat first love?
1. Chapter 1

Keep forgetting to forget about you…

Chapter 1

"I think that is everything," I said out loud to myself as I packed the last tank top in my suitcase.

"Everything but me," A smooth velvety voice said from the corner of my room as I jumped.

"Geez, you surprised me," I said before saying, "You know why you are not going. You would be stuck inside all the time and besides, I need some quality time with my mom." It was more than that, too, but I just couldn't bring myself to say anything to him about that.

"And I've told you I don't mind being inside as long as I am with you," Edward said.

"Well, I care and please, don't fight me on this, Edward. I need some time with my mother," I pleaded with him. I need time and space but most of all I wanted time with my mom. Spending the summer in Jacksonville provided the perfect excuse and of course, I jumped on it and I am NOT letting go of that golden opportunity now.

"I won't but only because I love you so much and I prefer not to fight. Please, to ease my mind, you have to promise me you'll be extremely careful while you are there and take care of yourself. I would die if anything were to happen to you," he spoke gingerly as he wrapped his arms around my waist in a sweet embrace and kissed the top of my head.

"I'll do my best and I have the cell you insisted on getting me. I will carry it with me everyone where so there is no need to worry about someone kidnapping me or if I get lost on the way to the beach, which will probably happen, but I'll have Phil to help out. I'll call you every night." I gave him a big smile, hoping to ease his mind.

"This goes against everything in my nature to let you go alone." He whispered more to himself than to me.

"Let me?" I stated my question loudly. Here we go again. These are the things like that are beginning to annoy me more and more as they continue to come out of his lips. "You don't let me do anything. I am my own person and I do what I want."

He then began trying to diffuse the situation as soon as he saw me getting worked up. "That isn't what I meant, love, and I'm sorry to have upset you. Truly, I am."

I immediately began to calm down. The last thing I wanted to do the night before I left for the summer was fight with him. Instead I climbed up on my bed and patted the spot on the bed next to me as I lay down. He was obliged and laid down while pulling me into the cool circle of his arms. He began humming my lullaby and as I drifted off to sleep, I worried to myself how Jake was going to take it when I tell him I am leaving tomorrow for 2 ½ months. Closing my eyes, I let that slip my mind or well…tried was probably the better time. No matter how hard I tried I could help but his sad face flashed through my mind repeatedly. Why does it hurt so much…?

I woke up earlier than I usually do the next morning, which is a surprise to even myself, and I didn't even feel a hint of fatigue. Opening my eyes to the sun shining brightly through my window, I thought, _Go figure_, I decide to go to Florida and then we finally get sunshine and on the worst, probably most heart breaking day of my life. _Lovely._ I rolled over to find Edward gone and a note in his place. That's the typical morning routine but for some reason…I didn't want to read the note this time. I did, though, because I was rather curious and having an unread note on my pillow might cause suspicion if Charlie even came into my room.

_Bella my love,_

_I know you want to speak with Jacob today. Please be careful and take care of yourself. He can kill you if he loses his temper. I cannot live without you. I will see you tonight to take you to the airport._

_My love always,_

_Edward_

I sighed. That's a nice way to remind me that I have to speak to Jake today. I was worried about his reaction, more so than I had been of Edwards. I found myself surprised at this thought. I didn't want to examine it too closely for what that meant right now though because I have plenty of time for that in Florida.

I'm not quite ready to face Jake and that conversation yet so I jogged down the stairs to get something to eat. The easiest and quickest route was cereal. Hopefully, I could keep it down since I was so nervous. After I finished with my cereal, I cleaned the dishes. Wanting to stall for more time, I found myself doing a little cleaning here and there. When I couldn't find anything else to clean, I finally had to suck it up and take a shower. I took more time than what was necessary in the shower. Eventually, I realized I had to face the music sooner or later and, even though I rather it be later, I got out, dried off, and got dressed without a minute to spare. I threw my wet hair into a ponytail brusquely, grabbed my keys, and headed out to my crimson red truck.

I tried to formulate what I would say on my way to La Push but it wasn't going the way I thought it would; quick, easy, and above all, simple. I want to let him know that I am going for time to myself without giving him some kind of false hope. Oh, who was I kidding? He is part of the reason I needed to get some time and think, away from it all. I just could not tell him that. Not only because it would give him hope, but because one minute with Edward, he would know too and I just cannot have that, no, not till I get things a little more figured out.

By the time I got to Jakes house, I had no better idea what I was going to say so I decided I would just wing it. I was not met at my truck by Jake, like I usually would be, so I made my way, slowly might I add, to the front door and knocked. To my dismay, Billy answered the door.

"Well hey there Bella, Jake isn't up yet but you are free to wait," he informed me, with a look in his eye that told me he knew about me leaving, and the fact that I hadn't told Jake yet.

I felt like I had to clear it up with him so I said "I was going to tell him, Billy, but I just never found the right time."

"So, instead you wait till the day you're leaving?" He questioned. "I never took you for that type.

"What type is that?" I asked, quietly fearing I knew exactly what he was going to say.

"The type to run away and hide from your problems and I know you think Jake is going to react badly, but I guarantee he is only going to be upset that you waited so long to tell him while everyone else knew and had a chance to weigh in their opinions." He told me calmly. My worst nightmare has come true! He said it!

"I don't mean to hurt him. I don't know why I do it. Every time I turn around, I am hurting him more. That's why I'm going. I'm going to get some time away and think. I really need to think about things thoroughly," I frown. I had not told anyone else the whole truth before.

"Well just tell him the truth. Who knows? He might surprise you," He said with a wide smirk. "Anyway, why don't you just chill out and wait for him to get up then you can have your whole conversation?" He rolled into the living room and switched on the TV.

"I may end up having to wake him up though if he sleeps too long, my plane leaves at 6," I notify Billy. He just nods and turns back to the television screen with more interest in the grueling football tackles than my worries. That's the way it should be. No one should have to worry about me so much. I sigh, sink into the chair, and watched the guy in uniform knock down the wide receiver. I don't understand football.

As I sat there watching TV, I felt myself fall into a soft slumber. That slumber turned into a dreaming and soon enough, I was consumed in my own fantasy. I was standing at the door of a small cottage, which was beautiful in a simple way, dressed in the usual jeans and a t-shirt, calling two small children into the house. They sat down at the table and began eating the lunch I had prepared for them.

One of them exclaimed, "Mom this is the best lunch ever!"

And I replied with the most light-hearted smile I have ever smiled, "Well if you kids hurry, we can catch daddy on his break and bring him a few sandwiches of his own."

They began to eat a little faster while I had to remind them to chew their food thoroughly. You could tell they were excited at the prospect of seeing their dad by the spark of joy in their eyes at the word "daddy". After they finished, I packed them up and we headed off. We stopped at a little garage and backed up when someone, who was rather tall and muscular and might I add hot, came out of the garage door. There, in all his glory, was Jake.

The kids, who were rather peppy, ran to him screaming "Daddy! Daddy! Look what we brought you! Mommy made it but we brought it for you."

He laughed and scooped them both up twirling them around. Then he put them down and came to me and whispered "You are the most amazing woman, Mrs. Black, and no one can ever replace you. I love you." Then he pulled my face to his and began kissing me. The children, who I noticed had my eyes and his complexion, were giggling behind us, amused. I didn't say anything for I was lost in this kiss…Then I was being awoken by someone. I tried to pull away and snuggle farther into my dream but whoever it was, was not having that.

"Bella wake up." I heard Jake call my name and the words "wake up".

"OH!" I sat up, surprised, and a little disoriented. It was only a dream but yet, despite that fact, It had felt so real. Despite all things I've known to be true and that I've been denying…I want it to be more than a dream. I wanted it to be a reality. Now that I know it was only a dream, I feel the absence of it and want to cry. That right there is why I needed to get away and think. I can see my future here and while I want it, I'm just not sure if I wanted it bad enough. I just needed to get away. This brought me back to reality, like a bell, and reminded me of my flight.

"Oh no Jake what time is it?"I ask him, slightly hysterical.

"Whoa, calm down Bells, its only 2:30. Why? Are you in a hurry or something?" he questions me, a little suspicious at my sudden panicking.

I felt my face grow hot and knew it was time to face the firing squad. "Jake, can we take a walk? Maybe down to the beach…" I fidget with my fingers, already knowing the answer but still nervous..

"Of course Bella but I got to say you're scaring me though. Is _he_ making you rush back? Can't he just accept for once that you and I will always be friends?" Jacob scowled.

"No, Jake, it's not him. I actually have something I need to talk to you about…something we should have discussed awhile ago." I told him with my face flaming and I knew instinctively it was beet red.

"Okay. Sure, let me get a shirt on, grab something to eat and we can head out." He said while eyeing me suspiciously. He ran back in his room and grabbed a t-shirt, which I noticed was tight against his rock hard abs, and I couldn't help but blush even more when he caught me looking.

"Feel free to look Bells," He smirked deviously and winked his right eye at me." I sometimes sneak a peek myself when you're not looking."

I didn't think it was possible, but I felt my face grow even hotter at this statement and a completely different heat spread elsewhere. He looked at me funny but didn't push it as he headed to the kitchen to grab a snack.

We headed down the beach to our tree. We both sat down and I looked at him then my hands then him then my hands before he finally spoke.

"Look Bella just spit it out already. I'm a big boy. I can handle it. You're not allowed here anymore are you? I just knew it. Damn blood—"he started before I cut him off.

"No Jake I already told you it's not him okay! This is something I should have told you a month ago but I kept putting it off hoping for the right time and now I'm out of time." I finally just spat it out "I'm leaving for Florida for 10 weeks. My plane leaves at 6."

He sat there looking stunned before speaking "okay why didn't you tell me this before?"

"I told you Jake I could never find the right time before," I say quickly."Everyone else was so against it that I figured you would be too and I just couldn't stand you not wanting to talk to me with the little bit of time I had before I had to leave."

That seemed to be the wrong thing to say because next thing you know he was trembling and he spit out between his teeth. "So…you mean everyone knew already and had time to prepare for this? Even Edward? But you didn't tell me till the day of?"

Wow, I guess Billy was right after all. The man knows his son well. I mused before rushing to explain and try to calm Jake down. "Whoa Jake calm down I just couldn't bear it if you didn't want to see me."I went over to him and wrapped my arms around his waist and put my face which was beginning to get streaked with tears into his chest. "Please, don't be mad at me. It's such a short time and I'll be back before school starts. I just couldn't bear it if you're mad at me. I need you." Just how much he would probably never know…

His trembling stopped and he put his arms around my waist, and in typical Jake fashion, he breathed, "See, I told you, you love me but you just didn't know it."

I pulled away and swatted him in the chest. My hand stung a little but I said, "Jake your crazy."

He looked forlorn for a second before brightening up, and saying, "Hey, why don't I go with you? I got out of school last week. You know, with your luck, you wouldn't survive without someone there to protect you."

I playfully swatted him again and thought, wow, does he sound like Edward or what with that statement? No, he's less possessive and it didn't sound like an order. It sounded more like a choice. Then I explained, "You can't go for two reasons. One, your pack needs you and Two, Edward would have a cow after I told him he couldn't tag along and you going would just make him jealous and him jealous is not a good thing. I just need some time to get my head on straight and get a break from everything."

"You mean a break from me?"He whispered looking sad and alone, with those puppy dog eyes I just couldn't tear my own eyes away from.

"No not just you Jake, everyone. I want to go spend some time with my mom and just think, okay? Isn't that good enough?"

He sat there for a second, then brightened up and with a little bit of hope in his eyes, asked, "Well can I at least take you to the airport?"

I hate to see him sad but I had already promised Edward so instead, I tried to compromise. "Well… I already told Edward he could take me but you can pick me up when I come back, okay?" Maybe by then I would have figured something out and we could all move on and I would be able to just choose someone once and for all, instead of hurting the people I love.

He wasn't happy about it but he took the offer anyway. "So how long do we have before you have to go?"He asked

"Not much I want to double check everything and make sure I am really ready, then get there early to check my bags, and everything."

This seemed to make him even gloomier so I wrapped my arms around him and whispered into his chest "I'll miss you Jake so very much but you have my number. You can call or text me anytime. And I'll be back in 10 short weeks, alive, I promise."

"I'll miss you too bells, more than you'll ever know." He said into my hair. "Well, we better get you back to the house so you can head out."

We walked back to my truck and said our final goodbyes. We hugged and he kissed the top of my head. I could have swore it looked like he was going to cry but he pulled it in and said "Goodbye Bella…I love you," before he walked away and into the house.

My eyes pricked a little at this because I, honestly, wanted to be able to say it back to him but for now, I have to go on my way so I can get ready to go. As I drove out of La Push, I thought to myself, well that did go better than planned. Maybe Jake is maturing…

**For those who have read my work I just want to let you know this is an ADOPTED STORY that was originally titled "Summertime" by fefetwimom. This chapter is the first two chapters of the story combined with a little of Nefis aka Shiane editing. Just letting you guys know because the writing style is certainly more straight forward than my own. I would put more imagery into it. But I thank her for letting me continue this awesome story and hopefully, I will make it a sucess and I know, I know...finish the other stories and stop being a bumb and finally write the third fanfic story to my little trilogy going on there for Twilight. But anyways, I hope you guys enjoyed it! Please review! :)**


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Bella POV

The trip was fun but I still don't know who to choose.

"Have a nice trip home," My mom hugs me. "Call me when you get home, okay?"

"I will mom," I wave good-bye, and go on the plane.

The plane ride was kind of quiet…well it was, until the clerk came to me.

"Do you need anything?" She smiled.

I shook my head and turned my head back to the two photos in my hand; one of Jacob by the waterfalls and another of Edward side by side with me. The nosey clerk, who did seem nice, looked at the photos and pointed to Edward.

"Is that your boyfriend?"

"Yes," I sigh.

"Shouldn't you be happy? I mean, I would be if I had a guy that beautiful," She beamed.

Should I be happy? I should be, shouldn't I? I'm not though and that's the thing that keeps me holding onto Jacob's company. I need him to make me happy. I need _him. _

"I don't know," I say quietly.

The clerk, picking up the hidden message in my eyes, read me like a book. "Choose whoever makes you the happiest. Don't throw away your hope of happiness. It is your life."

And she left. She must've seen it. I have to choose between the two of them and she has a good point.

The plane ride went quicker than I thought it would. Soon enough, I was walking out off the plane and greeted by a somewhat well dressed Jacob. He wore a tight black shirt that showed all of his muscles, of course, and some straight leg jeans and black sneakers. He held his hands behind his back for somewhere…as if he was hiding something but I didn't ask. I was just happy to see him. I practically dragged my bag with me, dropped it afterwards, and hugged him.

"I missed you too," He chuckled and then hugged me back. After setting me down, I noticed what he had dropped on the floor to hug him. It was a bouquet of roses; white, pink, and red. Jacob stooped down to pick it up, frowned, and then shyly handed it to me without his usual smirk. "These are for you. Sorry if they are a little messed up…I wasn't planning to be attacked with a big hug. Welcome back."

I couldn't help it and I don't know why I did it but out of nowhere, I started to cry as I looked at the roses. Jacob had his arms around me in seconds.

"Bella, what's wrong? Did I say something wrong?" I didn't respond. "Come on Bells….please. I need to hear your voice."

I still did not respond.

Jacob, who was worried, just stared at me and grabbed my bag. "I guess I'll just take you home now. You must not want to talk to me anymore."

I still cried on the way to the car and eventually, I did stop crying. I laid back in the car seat and dropped the roses. Jacob tried not to look at me but he could not hide his worry from me. He's upset. I sigh heavily and place my hand on Jacob's arm.

"Pull over Jacob," I say to him.

"We're almost there Bella," He told me. "Walking home is dangerous, especially for someone like you, who always find trouble somewhere."

"Pull over Jacob," I tell him. "I'm not walking home. I want to talk to you."

He looked at me and stared.

"Please?"

Grumbling, Jacob pulled over into an empty, vacant lot and killed the engine. "Okay, now you want to talk, huh? Are you going to tell me what's wrong?"

I shake my head and let a few more tears drop down. "Nothing's wrong Jacob."

"You were crying…"

"I'm crying because I know who to choose now."

Jacob stopped talking and turned his head to the side.

Jacob POV

_She's picking him! She's picking him! I don't know what I'm going to do with myself. _

Bella POV

I watch a tear drop fall from his eye and suddenly, I grab a hold of his arm. "You didn't let me finish."

He just looked at me.

"I took me a while to figure out but…Jacob…I love you. It's my life. You make me feel more alive than I have ever been and probably ever will be. Edward had left me before and you, you never left me. You were always there and I hope you always will be. I want to be by your side. I love Edward but I love you more. I need you. I can't go on without you behind me every step of the way. Jacob….I love you."

Okay, so that made no sense.

"Am….am I being too…I don't know, weird?"

Jacob got a grip of my hip, brought me over to him, and kissed me. If it wasn't for his hands holding onto my waist, my legs would've turned to Jell-O and I would've passed out as well. His mouth was like fire, hot, and addicting. I know I shouldn't have (mostly because Edward still doesn't know about any of this yet) but I did anyway. I kissed back. He bit down on my lower lip a bit and his tongue begged entrance. I opened my mouth slightly, granted him entrance, and his tongue explored my mouth and I explored his. The kiss ended faster than I wanted it to but by the look of Jacob's face I could tell something was wrong. He held onto my waist more protectively and growled.

"What's wrong Jacob?" I asked at once.

He let go of my waist, unfortunately for me, and got out of the car. "Hello Edward," Jacob growled.

"Jacob," Edward's body came from inside of the shadows. He stepped out of the darkness and scowled. "Nice to see that you brought Bella home but I think you should go home. I can drive her. Your pack needs you."

"Your coven needs you," Jacob grimaced, "besides; Bella said _I_ could take her home."

I ran out of the car and stood by Jacob's side.

"Bella…" Edward was no longer talking to Jacob but Jacob still scowled and hugged my waist. "Be rational about this. He's dangerous."

Looking down at the ground, I say slowly, "I'm sorry Edward. It's over."

"Why love?"

"I love Jacob."

"How could anyone love a…a…_dog_?"

I don't respond so Jacob takes the initiative and speaks for me. "Leave Cullen."


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3:

Bella POV

"_How could anyone love a….a…dog?"_

That rang in my head.

_"How could anyone love a….a…dog?"_

I shake my head of the memory of him walking away from me. I don't know why I didn't run after him. I should've. I should've like I did when he was at the mercy of the Voltouri, but this time, for some reason, my heart told me to stay.

"Are you okay, Bells?"

"Yeah, I'm fine Jacob. Thanks."

"Let's get you home."

"That'd be great."

We got back in the car and drove in silence. I watched the trees pass by through the window. Do I dare look at Jacob? Yes. I turned to look at him and his eyes were focused fully on the road but then he caught me staring. His brown eyes found mine and then he turned back onto the road.

_What's going on between the two of us? _

Jacob POV

Bella was staring at me and I caught her. As soon as she was caught, she turned her head back to the window and I, the road.

_Does this mean we're going out? _

I shake my head. Inconceivable. I look at the radio and turn it on. The silence is killing me. At first I recognized the voice, Jesse McCartney, but I did not recognize the song. Well, it's Jesse so it must not be that bad. I mean, girls practically fall to their knees with these kind of pop stuff.

**Has anybody ever felt this way  
Has anybody been ripped apart  
Anybody give everything to the one they love  
Am I the only one left behind  
Am I the only one who hates goodbyes  
God I know this can't go on forever**

As soon as I heart "ripped apart" I had to change. I fumbled with the buttons and wasn't able to change the station until the chorus ended. Lovely song, Jesse McCartney, but why sing that now? I blame the radio. Another song played and it sounded some safe.

It was a song by Bruno Mars. I think it's the Lazy Song. I haven't heard the whole thing but from the words that played at the beginning, it sounded safe to me. I placed my hand back on the steering wheel and let the music play.

**Today I don't feel like doing anything  
I just wanna lay in my bed  
Don't feel like picking up my phone  
So leave a message at the tone  
'Cause today I swear I'm not doing anything  
Nothing at all**

Tomorrow I'll wake up, do some P90X  
Meet a really nice girl, have some really nice sex  
And she's gonna scream out: 'This is Great'  
(Oh my god, this is great)  
Yeah

I fumbled with the buttons again as soon as I heard the word "sex". Darn it! Why doesn't this radio play songs that'll cheer her up, not make her feel sad…or in this case, extremely uncomfortable. I, once again, placed the radio on another station. Please…play a good song. An appropriate one too, please.

**Honey came in and she caught me red-handed  
Creeping with the girl next door  
Picture this, we were both butt naked, banging on the bathroom floor**

How could I forget that I had  
Given her an extra key  
All this time she was standing there  
She never took her eyes off me

I couldn't take it anymore. "It wasn't me" by Shaggy is definitely NOT helping the situation. I pressed the "off" button on the radio and huffed, frustrated. Then I heard a giggle. Is the radio still on? I turned my head and found that Bella was laughing.

"What's so funny?" I asked, confused.

She kept laughing and she laughed so hard so was tearing up.

"Am I missing something?" I looked at the road. I see nothing funny here. I stopped at her house and stopped the engine. "Okay, I give up. What's so funny?"

"You."

"Huh?"

"You and the radio," she spoke through laughs. "Every time you changed it, the songs were saying something crazy."

Eventually, I did catch on. I laughed too and at my own expense too. I got out of the car. "I'll help you take your luggage out of the trunk."

"I got it."

"But I got it."

"Well, I want to pick it up."

"Why? I can do it in half the time you would take to get out of the car and you could just relax."

"Are you calling me slow?" She raised her eyebrow.

"Maybe." I cough. "slowpoke." Cough.

"Okay, you're on."

"What do you want if you win?"

Bella had to think for a second. "Hmm…if you lose, you have to let me drag you shopping."

"But you hate shopping."

"Yes, but you hate it more than I do." She raised an eyebrow. "Dress up Jakey!"

"You did that when we were little. I thought you were past that, you and Rachel both."

"Nope."

"And if I win?" I leaned forward.

"What do you want if you win?"

"Hmm..that's easy."

"What?"

"You have to let me take you on a date."

"You got yourself a bet," she holds her hand out. I hold out mine and we shake. We both hold onto our seatbelts.

"On your mark…" she says.

"GO!" I yell and practically run out of the car. Grab both suitcases so there is none left for her, walk into the house brusquely, and drop them on her bed.

I go to her window to see her down next to the car. I open the window and pop my head out of the window.

"I win Bella!"

*** I just realized I have been neglecting my adopted story. Ugh! Well, this is the next chapter that I actually wrote. The songs I used were Anybody by Jesse McCartney, The Lazy song by Bruno Mars, and It wasn't me by Shaggy. So…is Edward going to show up again? Why does that one line stand out the most above all the others said in the last chapter? Think about that. : ) Review! ****


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